"Real Women"

"Real women have curves,"  said a whole lot of people over the Internet.

Really? I thought all adult females were women, and real, no matter the amount of contours.

I see the comments people make, claiming that so-and-so's body is unrealistic, or gross, or some other insensitive adjective. Aren't all women real and unique and beautiful in their own way, regardless of size? Then why the heck are we regularly led to believe that men only like women who are built a certain way, and if they don't have just the right volume of this or that, then they simply aren't worth looking at?

Every man out there apparently admires the same body type; so if she weighs too much or too little she just can't be attractive to anyone, ever, no matter how great her character traits are? I happen to know not all men want the same kind of woman, so why do articles and their comment threads keep trying to prove the contrary? It's like people think their personal opinions are scientific evidence.

Here's a lame saying I've seen: "Real men go for meat. Bones are for dogs." First of all, what a rude thing to say. Some women are naturally slim, no matter what they do or what they eat. Some men prefer that look. Some women aren't slim, no matter what they do or what they eat. Some men like that. It stinks that people feel the need to say one group of similarly shaped women is less (or more) desirable than another. I think it's feasible to believe that some men are attracted to an array of womanly shapes. Maybe the men who realize there is more to love about ladies than just physical appearance.

Just the other day I saw an article and accompanying photo of a curvy "plus-sized" woman in a bikini. Since I've been in the process of writing this rant, I felt the need to skim through some of the comments. One of the first I noticed was, "FINALLY! A normal-looking body!" Of course a bunch of people clicked "like" on that comment, which was posted by a woman. What is normal? Why is it okay for people to bash one body type or another? I think women dislike being called "too skinny" just as much as others don't enjoy being labeled "too fat."

I have a few bones here and there that stick out a little. It's just the way I am built. A boy once compared my figure to that of a skeleton and joked that I might blow away in the wind. After a five-pound weight gain, a different male told me I was chubby and a turn-off. Those evaluations were nothing but two separate perspectives. (And boys think girls are choosy!) I've tried not to let assessments like that get to me. I've learned to appreciate my frame the way it is on any given day. I should be able to look the way I feel most comfortable, for me -- not for anyone else. But I guess that would be mighty selfish of me. ; ) My physique will never be acceptable to everyone, but it shouldn't have to be.

My point is, not all men favor the same female form. The first boy I mentioned probably would have preferred a slightly heavier version of me, when the second male would obviously opt for the lighter version of me. This is proof that the same body can be too much of something for one person and not enough of it for another person. So how can anyone make general statements about how a girl is "supposed" to look?

People need to keep mean observations to themselves. They don't help. It's especially hard to shrug off unkind comments from people we personally know. And all the online know-it-alls need to hush up once in a while instead of typing the "truth" about what guys like and don't like.  (I really should stop reading biased articles and the accompanying comments.) Everyone is different! That's the way it'll always be. Generalizations are annoying. What one person loves, another doesn't. And that should be okay.

It shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks or says about anyone else's body. If a woman feels comfortable in her own skin, who is anyone else to tell her she's wrong?