Ya know what? My last five blog posts have received zero comments each.
Ya know what else? I honestly don't care. Yes, you read that right. I don't care. But I don't know why I don't care. That's not normal for me.
I've been experiencing a rough spot, to say the very least, in my little life. Because of that rough spot, I'm incredibly stressed and overwhelmed about things I don't feel capable of doing.
Things like raising my children. Making sure they are fed, their homework and/or practicing is done, and that they're happy.
Like maintaining some semblance of household organization.
Like having responsibilities.
It's all I can do to just get the bare minimum done. I'm burned out. I feel like I'm failing every section on a big, important test. Oh, wait. That's because I am.
I have things bringing me down, and I can't seem to focus on anything else. I float along, faking my way through each day. It's scary. I don't like it. But I don't know what to do about it. My poor, fragile feelings have taken a major blow during the past few weeks. It's nothing that can be solved, either. I just have to learn to not care about the things that inevitably crush me. But that's hard for me to do. I do care. I try to carry on, but it's not easy. I don't know what to do.
Life's hard sometimes, but it's what helps us appreciate all of the good times, right? But you are NOT failing. I know the feeling, but you're not. Just keep chugging along and it will get better. As my wise grandmother always told me- "this too shall pass". Hope things start looking up soon!
ReplyDeleteOh shoot, I've been wanting to comment on your camping one and I just haven't done it. And I know you don't care about the comments, but I should have a while ago! Where did you guys go camping? Was it in Idaho? I love camping in Idaho. Anyway, I started reading your blog lately because I love it and it takes me back to carefree high school days when I sat next to Random Shannon in choir! And I'm feeling a lot like you lately. I am sure not for the same reasons. I quit my teaching job in June and I haven't felt motivated to do hardly anything. I have managed to keep the dishes basically done and the clothes washed (however not folded or put away) but other than making sure I watch Matlock every day, I'm in a slump feeling ungood enough. And I keep thinking that if I had kids then I would feel motivated to get things done, and feel better about myself, but I need to remember the grass isn't always greener and like you I have to learn to not let things crush me.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry this was so long. But I just wanted you to know that I'm out here enjoying your life through your blog!! And I hope you find what you need.
I hate it when i feel that way in life. it's hard to pull out of it. i've dealt with that for a few months this year but i'm out of it now. took some antianxiety meds to help. i don't care about comments anymore either, because i never get them. it's a rarity. i've just come to realize that people are busy and i'm writing it for myself anyway. i just appreciate the ones i do get! feels good to know that someone is out there! i think google reader is half the problem too. i don't go to most blogs anymore since i read in reader so i don't comment often. hope things get better. we should go on a double date soon.
ReplyDeleteoh shannon...I've been a slacker with my blog reading...I'm so sorry you are having a rough time...I need to come up and visit and we can make some cookies complete with sprinkles and watch Pajama Game while wearing lime green leg warmers...
ReplyDeleteOh, how many times in my married life have I felt like that? Many times over, that's for sure. I've thrown many a pity-party and have cried alone, to my husband, alone some more..... In times like these I try to remember that discouragement is Satan's biggest tool. You must be doing *something* right because it seems he's trying to get to you, which then breaks down your family.
ReplyDeleteSometimes a few hours alone makes a difference and helps me bounce back. Other times, it just takes putting my head down and forging on. Taking it one day at a time, or even one hour at a time, is all I can do in moments like this, sometimes. I pray constantly in my head/heart to just be able to make it through the current tantrum, whining session, kids fighting for the 100th time, dinner not pleasing everyone complaints, etc. I don't know if you are a crier, but that always helps me feel better, too.
Everyone feels overwhelmed at times, mothers perhaps more frequently than others. Reach out to a friend - chances are they feel or have felt exactly the same way. (((HUGS)))
sorry for the lack on punctuation. I know it made it harder to read, but I'm holding the baby and don't have the patience to go back and edit. I hope you get the gist of what I was saying. :)
ReplyDelete